How to Talk to a Man --- Top 10
Approaches That Work
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June 14, 2012, last updated June 18, 2016
By Alex Elson, Contributing Columnist






How exactly do you talk to men? The mere thought of
approaching a man makes some of us break out in a
nervous sweat.

Relax, you're not alone. There are few things in life that are
shared amongst all mankind: a breath, a tear, pain and joy,
to list a few of the basic commonalities. But one of the
subtler shared experiences that we as humans have isn’t
necessarily connected to an emotion, but rather an event
--- the
unbearably awkward interaction with the opposite
sex. Whether it be a mumbled introduction, a conversation
that goes awry or an awkward laugh that unearths itself
from some unknown realm of your gut, we’ve all tucked
our tails and walked away from a conversation feeling like
an idiot. But is there really a best way to talk to men? Has
anyone figured it out?

Lucky for you, in this day and age science has an answer
for everything, even how to avoid the awkward interaction.
Sorry fellows, you’re going to have to wait. In today’s
article we look at the Top 10 Approaches for Talking to
Men.


























1.
Make Him See Red – Sometimes, its not what you say,
nor how you say it, but what you wear when you say it.


In a study conducted in May of 2012 by Université de
Bretagne-Sud in France, researches found that men ranked
women wearing red as both more attractive and as having
a higher sexual intent than their plainly clad counterparts.
Obviously, use the “lady in red” approach if you want this
conversation to go somewhere...

So, is
that the secret to the allure of those $1000 a pair
Christian Louboutin red-soled shoes?


[Update:

Women are also attracted to men who wear red. According
to a 2010 study from the University of Rochester led by DR.
Andrew Eliot, women find pictures of men more attractive
when they are placed against a red background as opposed
to a white one. In the experiment, the women were shown
the pictures for 5 seconds and then registered their
immediate impressions.]


2.
Roughen up the Edges – If you’re simply looking to have
a conversation with a man (with no hidden intent), perhaps
you should try talking like one. A study conducted by the
University of Phoenix in May of 1999 showed that men
often use rougher and more assertive tones than women.


While a woman might write in a friendly email, “Hello, I
would appreciate some advice,” men are more inclined to
write, “Hey guys, need some help.” Elegant words like
“acquire” were connected with women in the study,
whereas “get” was a word more commonly used by men.
So perhaps if a woman is trying to talk to a man, the
friendly approach need be thrown out the window. Make
the man comfortable by talking to him as he is accustomed,
and you might just find the conversation lasting longer
than expected.



3.
Break the Ice with a Joke – In the same study as #2,
researchers found that men joked in approximately 63% of
conversations (of which 95% of the jokes were sexually
based), while women joked in 37% of conversations (of
which 4% of jokes were sexually based). To get a
conversation started it might be best to make a man
comfortable - loosen the atmosphere by tossing him a
zinger and see where it gets you.

4.
Unleash Your Natural B.O. – In a study conducted by the
University of California in 2011, researches concluded that
body odor for a woman during ovulation differs from the
body odor emitted during low-fertility periods. According
to this study, men can pick up on the scent of an ovulating
woman, and are more inclined to be attracted to a woman
at this time. Now, it is not to say that men will only talk to
women if they are attracted to them, but it certainly can’t
hurt.



5.
Dazzle Him with Your Pearly Whites – Ladies, you got to
smile. This one should be obvious. If you are approaching a
man, simply smile as you introduce yourself. A study
conducted in February of 2012 by the Básica University of
Valencia in Spain showed that people recognize emotions in
people based on facial expression.

If you smile, people will know that you are happy, and are
more likely to talk to you. Furthermore, positive emotions
also help to make one’s face more memorable, so a smile
won’t only get men to communicate with you, it will help
them to remember who you are.


6.
Talk the Talk – Research shows that for men and women
alike, more interest is paid to someone who speaks in a
similar fashion as oneself. A study conducted in January of
2011 by the University of Texas – Austin took a sample
population from a speed-dating event. At the event, men
and women alike were 3 times more likely to want to
pursue further contact with someone who shared a similar
language style than with someone whose language didn’t
match.


7.
Swallow Your Pride – As bad as it sounds, men respond
poorly to women who physically emit proud emotions.
According to a study conducted by the Dept of Psychology
and the University of British Columbia in May of 2011, while
women see a prideful man as attractive, the opposite is true
with regards to how men view women. But don’t worry
women, according to this study, you like your men
unhappy (another opposite –see point 5).



8.
Keep Him Guessing – If you want a man to pay attention
to you, maybe try ignoring him. According to a study done
by the Dept. of Psychology at the University of Virginia in
December of 2010, uncertainty increases interest in men. If
a man thinks you are interested, then you might try walking
away to keep his attention. As a male writer, it pains me to
say it, but sometimes teasing men is the best way to talk to
them.



9.
Be a Socialite – A study conducted by the University of
New Mexico in 2011 showed that while women are innately
more interested in men with financial status, men find
interest in a woman who displays social dominance. If you
want to grab a man’s attention and spark a conversation,
display your social wherewithal, and establish yourself as a
woman who is in command of her social sphere.


10.
Stay Curious – According to a study conducted in 2010
by the George Mason University, members of both sexes
are more inclined to wish to pursue a conversation with an
unacquainted stranger when the other person appears
curious. Moreover, curious people tended have more
fulfilling and engaging conversations than their less curious
counterparts.


















































Related
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Stop Family from Ruining Your Diet

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Why You Eat Too Much At Night

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Liar, Liar-How to Tell When Someone Is Lying

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